A Study on Program Development for the Remarried Couples' Marriage Satisfaction

재혼부부의 결혼만족도 프로그램 개발에 관한 연구

Abstract

This study attempts to develop marriage satisfaction program for remarried couples. Therefore, based on the in-depth interviews for 10 remarried couples, the plan was to present the direction of the program development for remarried couples' satisfaction. In this study, the marital satisfaction program of remarried couples should move toward increasing understanding among family members based on their strengths as well as conflicts and difficulties of remarried families. Therefore, the research will be meaningful in that it not only leads to successful remarriage but also enhance the happiness of family members.

본 연구는 재혼부부의 결혼만족도 프로그램 개발을 시도하는 것이다. 따라서 재혼부부 10인에 대한 심층면접을 바탕으로 재혼부부 결혼만족도 프로그램 개발의 방향을 제시하고자 하였다. 본 연구의 재혼부부 결혼만족도 프로그램은 재혼가족의 갈등이나 어려움뿐만이 아니라 그들이 가지고 있는 강점을 토대로 가족구성원 상호 간의 이해도를 높이는 방향으로 나아가야 한다는 것이다. 따라서 재혼부부가 부부 간의 유대감 강화로 갈등문제를 해결하고 결혼만족감을 높이는 것은 성공적인 재혼생활을 이끌어줄 뿐만 아니라 가족원의 행복도 역시 증진시켜준다는 측면에서 연구의 의의가 있을 것이다.

Ⅰ. Introduction

The recent changes in family patterns of modern society that we are experiencing have become greater, faster, and more diverse than ever. Among them, it can be seen that the number of single-parent families due to family disintegration is increasing and the proportion of remarried families due to the remarriage of one parent is increasing. That is, 24 percent of all marriages are remarried, and the average age of remarriage is 44.8 for men and 42.2 for women, with 70 percent having children under the age of 20 increasing the number of remarried children[1]. The type of remarriage has also changed, increasing the number of new forms of remarriage in the past between remarried men and first married women, first married men and second married women, both of whom are remarried. From these societal statistics and social indicators, it is speculated that the increase in divorces caused by social change will lead to the spread of "remarrigiable classes", eventually leading to the emergence of remarried families higher than they are today.

For these remarriage-related statistics shows that remarriage is more likely to break up than first marriage. In Korea, there are no exact statistics on divorce rates for remarried couples, but the rate of divorce counseling on remarried couples is increasing every year, and the number of remarriage counseling cases is growing 1.9 times for 9.1 percent in 2010 to 12.8 percent in 2015[2]. In the U.S., the first-marriage divorce rate is 23%, while it is higher than first-time marriage to 25%, with second remarriage reaching 65% and 74% higher[4].

Marriage has a profound impact on one's happiness, and the level of satisfaction with marriage has more to one's happiness than health, economic stability, and work satisfaction[3]. Remarriage is a new start in life to create a happy family with a new spouse after suffering the pain of divorce. Since remarriage families have made a new start after experiencing the breakup of previous marriages, the stability and satisfaction with remarriage is paramount. This is because marital relations are influenced by the relationship of the original family as the starting point of the family, and by the relationship with the children, they form a unique dynamics of relationships between families that follow generations. In other words, healthy, stable, and intimate marital relationships enhance the satisfaction of marriage and positively affect the child's upbringing, providing warm, empathetic care in a stable manner. This is important because it allows children to experience adaptive self-destination in the early stages of their lives and provides the basis for building a healthy self[4].

Despite the importance of remarriage, there has not been enough review of factors affecting the marital satisfaction with couples with young children in Korea. With few domestic studies on remarried couples existing so far[3][5][9], some studies mainly dealt with the role change of stepmothers, who were outnumbered among the types of remarried couples or who were known to have severe role conflicts within remarried families. Among them, Cha[6] deals with the role tension and marital satisfaction of remarried women, but, like the above studies, fails to include children of remarried couples or remarried families who play an important role in the satisfaction of remarriage. Among the studies that included both remarried couples are Jang & Min[6]. However, the research by Jang & Min[4] is only a general look at the lives of remarried families, limiting their ability to identify marital satisfaction and other marital relationship variables. The study by Jung, Yoo, Lim, Jeon & Chun[8] looked at the relationship between the marital satisfaction of remarried families and the aspects of parent, child, and kinship relationships, the only domestic study. According to a study by Jung, Yoo, Lim, Jeon & Chun[6], marriage satisfaction increases when kinship and family boundaries are clear, especially when there is a clear line of roles with ex-marriages. In particular, marital relations are found to be smooth when there are no co-children that gave birth after remarriage, which is considered necessary for further consideration as it shows results not consistent with previous research results. In addition, due to difficulties in tabulation, the number of samples, especially the number of male spouses, was quite small, limiting the depth of the marital satisfaction of remarried couples.

An overview of foreign studies on marital satisfaction with remarried couples is that of intermarriage communication with other variables (e.g., remarriage, family income, emotional support of spouses, ambiguity of family boundaries, etc.)[7]. These include variables related to adolescent children in remarried families such as Adler-Baeder & Higginbotham[8]. In particular, the nature of boundaries arising from the relationship between stepparents and stepchildren, role conflicts, and external social support properties that control conflicts, are found to have a very important influence on the adaptation of remarried families. As it is known that adolescent children of remarried families act as a major source of tension in the structure of relationships between newly formed couples, it is considered appropriate to target remarried couples with juvenile children when looking at the factors of marital satisfaction.

Despite the importance of marriage satisfaction programs for the stability of remarriage relationships, the development of programs for remarried couples was small. In other words, scholars have emphasized the need to develop programs for remarried couples[8], but the development of re-marriage-preparing education programs mainly focused on prospective couples preparing for remarriage[8][9] has various types of married couples. The reason for the need for a program to enhance marital satisfaction is that the general family program at the family welfare level is considered to have limitations of addressing the developmental work and desire resulting from the unique characteristics of the couple. Based on these needs, the ultimate aim of this study is to identify the factors of marital satisfaction in couples with young children and to try to develop programs to promote marriage satisfaction with couples with young children. This will be meaningful in that remarried couples with adolescent children will solve problems through improved marriage satisfaction, prevent family break-up following remarriage, and help family members improve their qualities of life through successful remarriage.

Ⅱ. Theoretical background

1. Characteristics of remarried couples with adolescent children

In the case of remarriage of children, children are generally regarded as having many conflicts in newly formed family relationships, such as child-rearing, difficulties related to discipline, and discrepancies in parental expectations. Family members of the first-marriage families have biologically, legally defined and clear boundaries, but in second-marriage families, boundaries are defined subjectively by the frequency and willingness of contact. For remarried couples, there is also no clear role code to guide relationships between new spouses and their children[10]. This is because the role of remarried families does not exist in the early stages of remarriage and develops over time. Such an obscure role can negatively affect remarriage relationships and add to stress. For example, many remarried parents have found it difficult to find a balance in their children's affairs, especially with respect to adolescents, or stress from conflicts that arise when there is disagreement among family members over them [11]. It is known that stepmothers are more difficult to adapt to their role as parents than stepfathers and other family members[12]. This translates into a lack of clear agreement on the role of stepmothers, while the role expectations held by spouses or in-laws are large and, moreover, lack of preparation as stepmothers[9][12]. Therefore, the smooth adaptation of stepmothers is reported to be of the vital importance to the stability of remarriage[8][10].

2. Remarriage and marital satisfaction factors

Marriage satisfaction is a very important concept in looking at marital relationships. Marriages' satisfaction has been the focus on remarriage studies by helping to understand the experience of remarriage and enabling evaluation of remarriage[7][13][14]. While studies show that remarriage satisfaction is no different from first-marriage couples and that overall happiness is higher than first-marriage couples[18], first-time couples are reported to have much higher levels of marital satisfaction than first-time couples[15].

A stable marital relationship provides children with a sense of confidence and security that their remarriage will last and creates a cooperative model for their own future marital relationship. So Visher & Visher[16] suggested that it was necessary to strengthen marital bonds before focusing on the relationship between stepparents and stepchildren in family therapy. If remarriage fails to form a stable bond, it is said that marital conflicts had a negative effect on the child's aggression, behavioral problems[17].

Summarizing the parameters related to remarriage identified with prior research at home and abroad, social demographic variants include income, gender and education levels, remarriage type, co-child status, family boundaries ambiguity, family and friends' support for family and friends, flexible communication[13]. Parent-child relationships, establishment of family identity. Permissible boundary formation of other family members, interdependence, mutual cooperation, problem-solving skills[18][10].

In this study, I would like to define remarriage as a subjective emotion and a kind of attitude, such as the joy, satisfaction, and happiness experienced by remarried couples throughout their marriage, following the concept of Crosbie-Burnett[19].

3. Theoretical Background for the Development of Marriage Satisfaction Program for Married couples

3.1 Family system theory

First of all, among the various theories of family studies, the various contents of family system theory will be used as the theoretical basis for program development. Since the 1970s, systematic viewpoints have begun to become a useful theoretical framework not only in the field of family studies but also throughout sociology[20]. Especially since the 1950s, remarriage family studies have been based on family system theory, and even today, family system theory still provides a high level of explanation in understanding the lives of remarried families.

Affected by the general system theory, the family system theory considers the family to be the smallest unit of social organization and also as a single social system or functional unit. The family system theory is also about the boundaries and rules of systems and sub-systems concerning who, when, and how family members participate in family life. A family consists of a group of individuals within a broader family system, a marital sub-system, a parent sub-system, and a child sub-system, and should look at problems through mutual understanding and overall analysis of family members. Of course, the importance of an individual is recognized, but when these individuals are related to each other, they have greater power and vitality than individual beings. In other words, the whole is stronger than the sum of the parts. The overall family image, family myth, and family history are the quality and characteristics of the whole family. Reflect. Individuals can understand accurately only when they consider the holiness of such a family[21][22].

In general, the couple subsystems were considered "family designers" under Satir[34] because they were the subsystems that had the most influence on the family. Variables affecting the quality of remarriage relationships were found to be in terms of remarriage, social support, family income, cohabitation, quality of step-parent-child relationships, the ambiguity of role expectations, consensus, and decision-making, and type of remarriage family[21]. In addition, belief in the role of stepparents[23][24] and agreement between spouses on the role of stepparents affects the quality of the conjugal system. In particular, the quality of parental-Ihinger-Tallman relationships [25][26] and the decision-making and consensus of couples related to the stepchild[27] were found to have a very important influence on the marital adaptation of remarried couples.

Much of the success of a family is determined by the system of conjugal child and parent-child subsystems, especially in the case of a child re-married family, the stepparent-child relationship becomes the biggest issue. In other words, the greatest complexity of remarriage families is due to the reset of external boundaries on who is and not who is a family member, and the internal boundaries of the family, meaning rules, discipline, alliances, and belonging within the remarriage family[28]. Therefore, in this study, these contents will be included in the program configuration.

3.2 Requisite Study on Marriage Satisfaction Program of Married couples

In the case of Korean remarried family programs, the development of remarriage-preparing education programs for prospective couples that are preparing for a theoretical model or remarriage is often only necessary[8][9]. A key summary of the existing remarriage education programs is presented in [Table 1].

Table 1. Social demographic and family characteristics of study participants

Jung, Yoo, Lim, Jeon & Chun[8] developed the program based on family system theory and developmental perspective, and argued that it was necessary to provide education programs for remarried families to improve family relationships because remarried families have a complex system and the problem is more serious, especially when their children are involved. This model was constructed so that a total of four programs were conducted for 2 hours and 30 minutes at each session and that remarriage could be carefully prepared and approached through a quick look at the remarriage, stand-alone for a new relationship, preparation for spouse roles, and checking parental roles. In particular, in the model of Jung, Yoo, Lim, Jeon & Chun[8], the remarriage preparation education was conducted for seven men and women, which resulted in increased overall remarriage readiness for participants and a more cautious change in their perception of remarriage. Cha[5] presented the family FIRO model of three areas of engagement, control, and intimacy to develop into a successful remarriage family for prospective couples planning or preparing to remarry. The program consists of eight times in total. It took 2 hours of 2 hours and 30 minutes per week for eight weeks. Although it consisted of activities such as lectures by subject, video viewing, case analysis, discussion, and presentation, it failed to verify the effectiveness of the program. In the study by kim[9], the remarriage education program was developed by surveying 123 couples living in Gwangju for their needs for the re-marriage education program and verifying the effectiveness of the program among the six early re-married. The study showed a strong desire for problem-solving between remarried couples, promoting communication between new parents and new children, and efficient child care. Lim[29], who conducted a basic study to develop education programs for improving the adaptability of young people with remarried families, suggested organizing programs to address the understanding of remarried families, alleviating the negative emotions and stress associated with the remarriage of parents, and resolving conflicts with new parents. In the study of Kim[3], she tried to develop a communication program for remarried families and a parental role program through a quantitative and qualitative survey based on the Satir theory and looked at the effectiveness of the study. While the need for support groups activation and remarriage education programs has been demonstrated in this study, there is a limitation that the contents of communication programs and parenting programs are not differentiated.

In addition, remarriage family programs (the integrated service for remarried families "family happiness recipe" or "remarriage family camp") under various family support projects at the Healthy Family Support Center are carried out in conjunction with family counseling but are mainly composed of basic program contents or one-time family events. The Korean Family Law Counseling Center's remarried family programs focus on legal counseling on remarried families and education for resolving marital conflicts.

Despite the importance of family programs to form relationships between remarried couples due to changes in the family structure of modern society, I will say that so far, the development of programs for remarried couples has been weak in Korea, especially research focusing on remarried families with young children.

In the West, based on family system theory and learning theory, a variety of family programs are being conducted for remarriage as well as for prospective remarried families. Lawton & Sanders[30] proposed that child-rearing techniques for remarried families with children, marital differences, problem-solving and communication techniques, and family relationship enhancement techniques would be the main content of the remarriage program.

Stepping Together(ST) is a six-cycle program for two hours developed by Bryant, Futries, Hicks, Lee, & Oshri[11]. Based on the family system theory, both couples and children (five years and older) were members of the program, introducing the striking difference between the first and second marriages. Legal relations between new parents and new children, general issues (realistic expectations), marital communication principle, development of new parent authority, and training in new children are needed. Developing communication strategies are necessary to reveal issues and emphasize strategic involvement in participants' personal family situations. The program consists of lectures, group, and couple activities and discussions.

Stepping Together: Creation Strong Stepfamilies (ST-CSS) was developed by Visher & Visher[16] as a 12-hour program for remarried couples. There is no theoretical background, just according to the development stage of Papernow[28] consisting of the myth and reality of remarriage, improved relationship between stepparents and stepchildren, enhanced marital relationship, and healthy relationship with ex-spouse, and no information on legal and financial issues, strategies to act as a parent, and building support relationships outside the family. Learning strategies combines the teaching style with the mutual discussion method. There is a program effectiveness verification questionnaire, etc. but there is not much data onto actual effectiveness verification.

Smart Steps(SmSt) is a Relationship Enhancement (RE) program developed by Adler-Baeder in 2001 based on the theory of ecology, family system theory, life cycle and family strength. RE aims to improve personal relationships between technical training and to help them adapt to various environments. The core of RE treatment emphasizes nine structured techniques through coaching, modeling and positive reinforcement, these nine different techniques have been systematically described. The sixth session will be held separately for couples and children, but in the last session, they will all participate in the program together. The content of the curriculum focuses on the difficulties that remarried families often faces, such as dealing with the myths of remarriage, financial problems, legal problems and understanding the developmental stage of remarriage, forming a caring new parent-child relationship, and relieving stress. Children and adults aged 6 to 17 will be eligible to participate, while adults and children will perform their respective programs for 90 minutes and participate in family activities together for the next 15 to 30 minutes.

Stepping Stones (StSt.), developed by [29], has a six-hour programs for domestic and group use. Although the development of children and the strategy of general parenting roles was composed mainly, the theoretical framework of their age and discipline problems was not publicly stated. Information provided for participating families (handouts provided to participants), discussions and activities were properly distributed. There are detailed leader guidelines only in the first phase, and general guidelines are only presented in the fifth period. The Stepfamily Enrichment Program aims to strengthen and enhance the relationship between married couples, new parents-new children.

Ⅲ. Development of the Re-married Family Relations Improvement Program

1. Procedure for looking at the direction of program development

A literature review was conducted based on the theory of the family system to look at the direction of program development. Next, in-depth interviews were conducted with the study participants to identify the program requirements, and the above data were reviewed on the program development directions.

1.1 Characteristics of In-depth Interview Survey and Participation in Research

In this study, the criteria for selection of study participants were set out to satisfy the appropriateness of sampling that should be observed in qualitative research. That is, participants in the study have been remarried for more than six months, are currently without family care, are not over 60 years old, and are limited to remarried couples of children (i.e., if they have remarried or their spouses are remarried), including one or more children. In addition, research participants included not only simple remarried families such as stepfathers and stepmothers, but also study participants comprising mixed remarried families.

1.2 Research method

Because it is difficult to select study participants using accurate probability sampling methods due to the characteristics of remarriage couples, snowball sampling, and purposeful sampling were utilized to suit the conditions of the study. The question about the in-depth interviews is, for example, what are the demographic questions, basic information about remarriage programs, the positive or the pros and cons of remarriage, and the factors for improving marital satisfaction? Your back.

From September 20, 2019, to November 9, 2019, the research was promoted through local newspapers, family-related organizations, counseling institutions, and remarriage-related cafes, and later conducted in-depth interviews with research participants until February 30, 2020. In order to help participants understand the context and circumstances of the interview, they wrote down the feelings of the company and its context of their transcripts. study participants were first described in detail on the purpose and contents of the study over the phone before conducting in-depth interviews. The interview took place in the researchers' lab or in a place where participants felt comfortable. Since in-depth interviews were unstructured open-ended interviews, there were no specific restrictions on interview time, but each case took 2 1/2s to 3 hours. In individual interviews for research participants, this research and participants' consent form consisted of academic use of research purposes and interview contents, identification and confidentiality of research participants, right to refuse interviews, permission to use the recorder during interviews, giving a post-interview recording review opportunity, and safe storage of interview materials.

One copy was written, signed, and kept. The interview details were recorded using a portable recorder with the understanding of the research participants, and the data were collected and analyzed by asking additional questions that were unclear or inconsistent during the interview. After the meeting, gift certificates were presented according to the agreement stipulated in the agreement. When interviewing or calling or e-mailing again to check the exact meaning of the data at a later time, the researcher contacted the research participants again to confirm their thoughts and feelings whenever they needed to be supplemented in the process of analyzing the data and moved the expressions of the study participants so that their thoughts and feelings would not be distorted.

According to the sociological characteristics of the participants, seven women, two men, were all nine, legally remarried. The average age was 48 for women and 54.2 for men. Religion had many Christians, with an average of 6.3 years of remarriage. For women, stay-at-home moms were mostly engaged in economic activities, with cases 4 and 10. The monthly income was between 3.3 million won and 4 million won, with the economic level recognizing itself as "medium, " cases 3, cases 4, cases 5, cases 6, and cases 2 and 7 as "higher." There have been no cases of receiving child support payments from his ex-husband after divorce, and there have been cases in which he has not contacted his ex-husband at all (case 4, case 5, case 7) but has continued meetings with his or her biological parents. Re-marriage after divorce (case 1, case 3, case 4, case 5, case 7, case 9) was higher than post-modern divorce (case 2, case 6, case 8). Social demographic and family characteristics of study participants are presented in [Table 1].

1.3 Research Analysis of Deep-Interview

The desire and development direction of the program for improving marriage satisfaction with married couples based on the in-depth interviews for this study is as follows. Saturday was the most preferred day for the program, and once a week or two, once a week for the program to run for 1 hour and 30 minutes or 2 hours. The requirements of the marriage satisfaction improvement program for remarried couples could be arranged into seven categories: pros and cons of remarriage, communication methods, conflict, and problem-solving skills, building close sex, building intimacy, and drawing a successful remarried couple. In addition, participating researchers suggested a one-night, two-day education program for remarried couples (because the change through direct action rather than a short-term ear-listening program can serve as an opportunity to resolve the conflicts that have been latent inside) or a special psychological test program for remarriage families. In particular, the respondents said that reading books or studying were necessary to overcome the current situation between couples to achieve a stable remarriage family (case 3, case 5, case 6, case 8, case 9, and case 10), indicating the urgency of developing a relationship improvement program.

1.3.1 Understanding of remarried couples

Growing children are getting a big scar. Especially due to family registry problems, children are having a hard time whenever they change their grades and submit their scripts to school. So they tell their children to work hard on their religious life.

My children still don't seem to have a natural relationship between their stepmother. Because sometimes when a wife makes something, for example, when she gives a gift, she cares first about her own children and secondly about my children. Of course, my wife is being treated fairly, but there's some discrimination that I can't see. This means that the relationship between my wife and my children from the beginning of my second marriage is far from the sacrificial love that a devoted mother shows. (Case 1)

Sometimes I regretted it a lot. I wondered why I remarried. I think it's hard for someone with a different personality and environment to meet and become a couple. (Case 3)

Sometimes when you don't admit to any emotional fact about the same personality problem that you have with your ex-wife, and you ignore it momentarily, you get the same image from your ex-wife. Then it's very hard for me to ignore and respect my wife personally. Perhaps this is a chronic problem that I haven't solved before. I'm afraid that if we continue to live without solving the problems of our personalities, one day we'll suffer again from them. (Case 5)

The positive side of remarriage seems to be the expectation of a new life after divorcing my wife. We can discuss housework together and rely on each other so that life can be a little more stable... Emotionally, I think it's a very good thing to change my loneliness into a normal family where my new wife has a mother at home. (case 8)

The reaction against the children at the time of their remarriage was harsh, sometimes unconcerned, and varied. I think he had some secret expectations about his new mother. But his son also ostensibly opposed remarriage. Because I think the memories of my childhood with my mom were a big obstacle to welcoming my stepmother. Especially because of the stereotype that there is only one mother in the world, she couldn't make room for a second marriage. So it was the hardest thing to convince me of the idea that there was only one mother in the world. (Case 9)

When I think about all the relationships I had at the time of my second marriage, my wife and I, my children and my wife were very awkward. Even though we exchanged words intimately, in conscious terms and actions... I was especially nervous about my wife's children. Because they were more dependent on their own mother than me, and they seemed to be wary of me. (Case 10)

1.3.2 Relationship with stepchildren: Solving family boundaries and role models

If there is an important developmental task in the course of a successful remarriage after the breakup of the previous marriage, it is the establishment of new boundaries and roles. This task can be said to be an important factor of remarriage, to the extent that the type of remarriage depends on the boundaries between the systems and the function of the role. In particular, the absence of social guidelines on remarried families in our society may lead to the divorce rate of remarriage.

Unexpectedly, she's always been careful. When I said I should call her mom, I said stepmother and I called her mom. It didn't take long. But after that, if something bad happens, you don't say "mom" at all. (case 4)

Even now, I still don't think I can share intimacy, express emotions, or exchange affectionate favors between my children and my new mother. I also have a lot of awkwardness in taking care of my wife's children and my own children. For example, it's not easy to say, "I'm your father." (Case 5)

1.3.3 Troubleshooting, Conflict and Stress Handling

The problem conflict resolution technique is to help and to ensure that the needs of everyone involved are as close as possible to come up with a solution as possible. Married couples say they tend to have a disagreement and don't easily resolve when discussing family affairs or going out for a while.(Case 3, case 4, case 8). The reason for this is that there are many issues that need to be addressed (economic issues, child care issues, etc.) although there is a personal difference between the two parties that their arguments are too clear and they do not yield.

At one point, I thought I'd rather change myself than changing him. As I start to change my mind, my husband is starting to change, but sometimes I feel like I'm right to live like this. (Case 3)

Emotional problems of today's remarriage are dealt with in many cases as a concession, but the feelings you feel after the conflict are very angry and have a lot of hatred and hostility toward the other person. In other words, I regret that I don't understand you and that you don't recognize me. What happens to my heart, a silent demand for authority on me. I think my meaning makes me even shabby. (Case 4)

I've thought about divorcing my current husband several times. I endured and lived, thinking of the wounds my child would suffer. The conflict may not all be resolved, but I want to learn how to reduce it. (Case 8)

1.3.4 Agreements on parenting and parenting through communication

Communication, as in all societies, is the basis of maintaining marital status. A remarriage family faces a variety of difficulties. For example, seeking consent to the role of a new parent in raising a child and deciding something as a parent often causes difficult situations in itself, which can affect the communication with remarried couples. This is because there are no clear role codes that define the relationship and role of new parents and new children compared to the role of parents and children in first marriages. Most new parents are known to feel confused with the extent to which parental involvement in their new child is appropriate, and to be under a lot of stress when family members disagree on the extent[18][24]. Therefore, in many studies [27][31][35], the role of parents of new parents was pointed out as a major source of tension for remarried families. In the present study, remarried couples living as one family members with different family histories responded that they needed to narrow their opinions on issues that frequently arise (case 3), communication techniques, etc. (case 6).

It was so hard to raise a child. I got into a lot of trouble when I was dealing with kids. She always asks me if I hit her even though she's not even her own mother, but I protect her even when I hit her. If I yell at you, it's not...Let's talk like this. (Case 1)

But I have two more sons. It was calm. It's calm. But he tried hard not to go. Well, I'm comfortable. What's wrong is that if your husband's children are in trouble, you think I'm your child, but if you say something about my child, I'm nervous. Of course, so will the baby brother. If I say something with the kids in the evening, I go after them and take care of them. Kids, it's my kid before it's yours. I'll teach you. It's not what you do. (Case 2)

I'm especially nervous about my wife's children. Because in the beginning, they were more dependent on their own mothers than on me, and they gave me a lot of sense of caution. Of course, this may be my subjective feeling. But the four children often go to McDonald's or pizza parlors and hang out naturally and are almost like brothers and sisters. But if you have a problem, you have to split the scallions. For example, clothes is never allowed between stepbrothers. So we fought a lot over this part and we came forward. My children still don't seem to have a natural relationship between their stepmother. Because when a new wife sometimes makes something, for example, giving gifts, it seems that she cares about her children first and our children secondly. Of course, my wife is said to be treating me fairly, but I think there is some discrimination that I can't see. (Case 5)

My husband scolds my kid for watching too much internet...Tell me to let me control myself if I'm in trouble. But I just feel rotten inside. I'm getting scolded for calling her, but she's still like that. In this case, when you scold your child, you scold him, but you feel stronger about what he does to our child. That's what I feel. I didn't want to talk. (Case 6)

It depends on your mood, but it still starts smoothly. In the past, I used to say whatever I was angry because my feelings were first, but I realized that it was of little use. I know that if I speak softly, my husband will listen... ...so these days I actually talk to him in soft words. But it's not really easy. Mr. President: I have heard a lot about the importance of communication between husband and wife, and I think that's really the case in real life. My wife and I tend to fight fiercely when we fight, so sometimes we don't know if our conversation went well, but neither does my wife nor I agree that we should solve the problem of dialogue. That's why they yell when they're fighting. (case 9)

I asked her to talk a lot from the time she got married, and she still tries to do so. Although I am still newlywed, I am trying to talk to my husband a lot. We have a fight, but we don't talk to each other or talk to each other and try to solve it. (case 10)

1.3.5 Sex problems and intimate marital relationships between couples

Family success is generally known to be largely determined by the parent-child subsystem, as the new parent-child relationship becomes the biggest issue in remarriage. The marital subsystem of remarriage is fundamentally different from that of the first marriage in that it is formed simultaneously into the parent child system. This situation means that the time and resources to form a strong bond between couples are not allowed and these should be shared with relationships to their children. Children are free to cross marital sub-systems, which can continue to hinder the formation of conjugal intimacy In addition, there is a greater possibility that the children could become united into a tension that could arise from a lack of conjugal solidarity, thereby creating an adverse effect on the role of their children. Thus, if remarried couples do not form intimacy, not to mention sexual aspects, they will suffer conflict and tension by the new parent-child system. In the new sub-system, remarried couples begin to get to know each other by changing their relationship between their spouses and their ambivalence with the past. At this time, if remarried couples do not form enough bonds or intimacy, they show vulnerability to the attachment to the past and break in again, ending their remarriage.

I needed someone to take care of my children, to look after me, to turn to. If we depend on each other, we'll live up to 80 percent, if not 100 percent. Even if it's hard right now, I hope we can develop the remaining 20% and fill it up. If it's 100%, what's better? (Case 1)

My husband always says that his child comes first, and then I come next. A child takes precedence over his wife. "There are many times when we are still in conflict over this issue and we feel sorry for such a husband." (Case 8)

1.3.6 We expect ourselves called 'one team’

It seems that remarried couples need to look far away together, where they can picture not only mutual consideration and engagement, but also future looks, in order to move toward a stable marital relationship. The following example illustrates the feasibility of developing a conjugal relationship improvement program, saying that it is necessary to collect diverse information of books, related education programs, or the Internet and make efforts to change their strengths and weaknesses.

Because the ability to understand each other seems to have been more than four years past the time of the early remarriage and to have the power and wisdom to understand each other from recent times. After the argument, the emotions, the evil parts of personality are revealed, I think there is wisdom of remarriage to create a new married life, a relationship to a child, etc. I think it also means that the strong idea that marital relationships should no longer be repeated as a vicious circle means that they are more interested in family and more careful. (Case 2)

In order to become a healthy and mature remarriage family, if it is clear that your personality is flawed or weak, your ultimate goal in life, and your consideration for your spouse, isn't it a success? (case 7)

I think constant change and understanding of each other is important. And I think we should develop the ability to put ourselves down and embrace each other. These problems are not enough to solve on their own. We need to collect various information through books, related education programs, and the Internet to understand your strengths and weaknesses, to understand others, and to change yourself. (Case 8)

My youngest son will go to college in two years and leave home, when my wife and I will be able to live comfortably. "My son leaves his parents anyway, and I believe that when he becomes an adult, he will understand it and that the relationship can be restored. (Case 10)

Ⅳ. the Development of the Marriage Satisfaction Improvement Program for Remarried Couples

The purpose of this study was to examine the development direction of the marriage satisfaction program of remarried couples. Therefore, the direction of development of a program to improve the marital satisfaction with remarried couples lies in the ability to accommodate changes in remarriage life and achieve successful remarriage relationship between accurate understanding and inspection of major problems in remarriage life(couple-parent-child relationship). In order to achieve the purpose of research, the literature survey on the prior research related to remarried couples and the theoretical review of the development of the program for remarried couples' satisfaction with marriage was carried out. Based on the factors of the program's composition, theoretical contents, and the in-depth interviews for remarried families at home and abroad, the basic direction for the development of the program for remarried couples was to be presented.

The characteristic of the demand for a program to improve the marital satisfaction with remarried couples revealed through this study is that it is important to enhance the understanding of remarried relationships while highlighting the strengths they feel in addition to the difficulties that remarried couples have in the early stages of remarriage. At the time of remarriage, remarried people had no idea how their new child's presence would affect the married couple's relationship, or rather had optimistic expectations that they could become good spouses and parents, but also had no realistic perception. Therefore, it is necessary for remarried family members to naturally understand that it is not easy about them to accept each other as a family, share intimacy with each other, and build affection while caring for each other, but also take time.

Many remarried couples said they were happy to go to the suburbs or go out to eat without recognizing the attention to the adoptive nuclear family by forming a remarried relationship from what seemed to be lacking in previous single-parent families. Of course, the problem is the excessive prejudice in our society, which prioritizes adoptive parents' nuclear family models, but there were also cases where remarried family members themselves were quite satisfied with outsiders' family affiliation, such as fatherhood, motherhood, and warmth that they had never felt in their biological parents (case 7, case 8, and case 9). These parts show the need for a remarried marriage satisfaction program based on their strong point of view. Other program demands revealed are that it is difficult to form a relationship to a new child, such as a family boundary problem caused by the title of a new child, and the demand for better marital relations is quite strong. Since remarried family relationships are more complex than first marriages and the boundaries are less clear, this period is often thrown into disarray by resetting external boundaries about who is and is not, and internal boundaries within remarried families, which mean rules, discipline, alliances and belonging. The demand for better marital and parent-child relationships is also related to the task of strengthening the marital relationship basically held by remarried families and developing a new parent-child relationship. In remarried families, it is also known that if the marital relationship is stable, the parent-child relationship will develop as well[16], a strong bond between remarried couples is a prerequisite for reducing marital stress and helps form and develop a positive parent-child relationship, and it also provides a buffer when faced with difficulties in other family-to-child relationships.

In general, it is known that much of the success of a family is determined by the parent-child subsystem, and in the case of a married family, parent-child relationship is the biggest issue in remarriage life. If a remarried family's marital relationship did not form intimacy, conflicts and tensions would be felt by the new parent-child system. In the new subsystem, remarried couples begin to know each other by changing their relationship between their spouses and ambivalence with the past. They also have to build emotional ties with their biological and new children living together and feel responsible for taking care of their non-living children. At this time, if the remarried couples do not form enough bonds, they show weakness tied to past attachment and break for again, ending their remarriage life.

Times are changing and families' lifestyles are changing, but remarried families are struggling because their responsibilities for the role of parents are not clear. In other words, biological parents share a normative definition of their role expectations, but in the case of remarried families, new parents and new children are at odds over how much code of conduct should be applied to each other or to their previous spouses. Especially in the role of stepmother, the position of accepting the stepmother of first marriage and stepmother of second marriage will be different. The stepmother of her first marriage has no parenting experience at all, so the problem of raising a new child may be considered more stressful. Similar circumstances may arise from first-time stepfathers.

4.1 Program Objectives

This program is aimed at improving the family relationship of remarried families. To achieve this objective, the following objectives have been established:

First, understanding the basics about remarried families.

Second, developing the ability to agree on the issue of husband and wife through communication.

Third, establishing relationships between new children: solving the family economy and role model.

Fourth, dealing with problem solving, conflict, and stress.

Fifth, forming an intimate marital relationship.

Sixth, portraying a remarried family called ‘one team’.

4.2 Program targets and operations

In principle, this program is intended for remarried couples and the number of participants in each session is limited to 10 to 20 for the efficient implementation of the program. The course consists of a total of six sessions, and the first one takes about one and a half hours to two hours. Each session consists of a 15-minute introduction, an hour-to-one hour lecture, and a 15-minute close with the participants' activities.

4.3 program structure

This program is constituted 6 sessions.

Table 2. first session program

Table 3. second session program

table 4. third session program

table 5. fourth session program

table 6. fifth session program

table 7. sixth session program

table 8. seventh session program

4.4 Conducting a program and verifying its effectiveness

Prior to the implementation of the program, a preliminary examination is conducted between the experimental group and the pseudo-control group at the same time, and the same follow-up test is performed to the two groups at the same time to compare and analyze the results of the two tests. The subjects of the study to verify the effectiveness of the remarried family education program are 20 couples with juvenile children that meet the criteria of the study subjects, among which the experimental group participating in the program is divided into 10 (or 10 pairs) and 10 (or 10 pairs) of similar control groups that do not participate. The adaptation scale of SAS used to measure the adaptation of remarried families, a dependent variable of this study, to measure the adaptation of remarried families, was used. In Kim[9], the contents were reviewed by consulting family-related experts and family scholars to prevent cultural differences and errors in translation due to family adaptation.

Advantage of The SAS scale is a self-contained measurement tool developed for remarried families, and the married family's cohesion is "compared to other remarried families, my spouse, step-children and I are very close, " "When my family plans to do something together, we all join, " and "my family has a lot of emotional turmoil, " and so on. "Considering all the circumstances, my remarried life is happy, " "my spouse and I are satisfied with each other's problem-solving methods, " said Marital Satisfaction. "I tend to feel comfortable with my spouse.""Our sex life is satisfactory, " "my spouse values me" and so on. The couple's communication test is a self-explanatory measure of 46 questions and includes both positive and negative forms of communication between couples. The total score range is 0 to 136, and the higher the score, the more effective communication.

Ⅴ. Conclusion

The purpose of this study is to examine the development direction of the marriage satisfaction improvement program of remarried couples with the new parents-new children as the middle body. The direction of program development found in this study is as follows. The desired day of the remarriage satisfaction program was Saturday, and it was preferred to be implemented once a week or twice a week, and the duration of the one-time program was about two hours. The results of this study's demand analysis were organized into six categories: basic understanding of remarried families, role of married couples through communication, ability to agree on child-rearing issues, understanding family boundaries and role models, solving problems, dealing with conflicts and stress, forming a close marital relationship, and portraying a remarried family as one. This is in line with previous studies [5][19][26][33] that remarried couples need communication, problem-solving skills, and the formation of a remarriage's closeness to improve their marriage satisfaction. In other words, negative communication between remarried couples can reduce remarriage satisfaction and it can be difficult in itself to seek consent for the role of remarried couples. These six categories consist of the program goals of understanding the basics about remarried families, acting as a married couple through communication, developing the ability to agree on parenting issues, establishing relationships with new children, solving family boundaries and role models, dealing with problems, conflicts, and stress, forming intimate marital relationships, and portraying a remarried family as one.

The fact that research participants proposed a two-day education program for remarried couples or a special psychological test program for remarried families is believed to show that pre-preparation or pre-education for remarriage was insufficient. Therefore, the fact that many people answered that they need to read books or study to stay well with a stable remarried family (case 3, 5, case 6, case 8, case 9) not only requires preparatory education before remarriage but also indicates the urgent need to develop programs to improve family relations after remarriage.

Specifically, looking at the program's needs, first of all, it turns out that it is important for remarried couples to reduce the role tension of remarried families. The remarried couple faced the cause of the role tension through talking about the role tension and changing the role, and understood and accepted the current situation of remarried life. Recognizing the specific differences between first-marriage nuclear families and remarried families, they may not have too high expectations for their new children and can accept their roles and positions through frank communication and feedback with program participants. Since second-marriage families do not have a clear role code to guide the relationship between new spouses and new children, step-parents may feel conflict. Therefore, confusion in the performance of roles in remarried families is reported to be general and almost predictable. Many of the roles in remarried families are unclear, but most researchers agree that the roles of new parents are the most dangerous, ambiguous, and stressful.

Second, it turned out that it was important to promote solidarity among new parents-new children. This shows the same research results as the implementation of the "Steping Together (ST)" program and the "SmSt" program, which are re-marriage family programs on the theme of forming a new parent-child relationship. If you look at the specifics, through the remarried family relationship improvement program, parents of remarried families are older than spouses, and the life cycle between individuals, parents and families does not match, and after many losses and changes, children and parents have expectations from their previous families, especially remarried families, which require more conflict, while the flexibility and coordination of family members are lacking, unlike first-marriage families. In first-marriage families, family members can have biological, legally defined and clear family boundaries, but in second-marriage families, family boundaries are defined subjectively by the frequency and will of family members. In other words, remarried families may include or exclude other family members from the boundary setting process. The obscurity of this boundary causes family stress and adverse function and also affects family solidarity by interrupting the bond between new parents and new children and couples.

Third, it has been shown that the solidarity of remarried couples has the effect of increasing marital satisfaction. A marital relationship is a relationship between two men and women who grew up in different families and formed by the ritual or system of marriage, which is non-blood but is the most closely related. According to Satir[34], married couples are architects of their families and are the cornerstone of their families, emphasizing the importance of marital relations in their families. A remarried family has two very important relational tasks, one of which is strengthening the marital relationship for the function of the family, the other being the new development of the parent-child relationship. Naturally, if the marital relationship is stable, the parent-child relationship will also develop. In other words, if remarried couples form strong bonds, marriage stress can be reduced and help form and develop positive step-parent-child relationships, and when faced with difficulties in other family circle relationships. Therefore, many studies have pointed out strong marital ties as an important factor in remarriage adaptation[16][18]. That is, stable marital relationships can provide children with confidence and security that their remarried family will continue and create a cooperative model for their future marital relationship. Thus, Visher & Visher[16] suggested in family therapy that it is necessary to strengthen marital ties first before focusing on the relationship between new parents and new children.

Fourth, the communication ability of remarried couples was shown to increase remarriage satisfaction. In this program, through empathy, listening, and active expression of emotions, we made people recognize that emotions are very important factors, and we learned how much it helps couples to understand and empathize with emotions. Therefore, through remarriage, they suppressed expressing emotions, looked at words expressing emotions, and suggested tasks to share with each other what emotions the spouse most expresses recently. In addition, they were asked to understand the adverse communication patterns that had focused only on the consequences of their actions without deeply sympathizing with each other and sharing their deep feelings, and to identify the deep feelings behind each other as a result of their actions.

Fifth, it has been shown that remarried couples' ability to solve problems improves their marriage satisfaction. Problem-solving techniques refer to the ability to successfully solve situations or problems that arise in real life interpersonal situations. Problems can occur to anyone, and problems can be seen as a result of recognizing that it is a process of growing up, not destroying oneself, defining clear problems and setting goals through accurate information collection, training to create and implement creative alternatives, encouraging and practicing them through planning and pre-practice for implementation. This program creates definitions and alternatives to problems in rational solution technology, and trains itself to create creative alternatives using brainstorming, and thus to plan and make decisions and implement them through forecasting and evaluation of implementation, which can be attributed to improved problem-solving skills. Thus, participants had overall dissatisfaction with the situation of remarriage but experienced the possibility of solving the problem through the improvement of rational solution skills and the improvement of the ability to solve the problem through practical alternatives and implementation, and the dissatisfaction with remarriage was perceived as a result of the lack of their own rational solution technology, which seems to have reduced the actual dissatisfaction level. This is the result of recognizing his responsibility for remarriage through a clear definition of the problem through the collection of information about the problem and recognizing his responsibility for the outcome and the possibility of resolving the problem through rational solutions.

The program requirements of this study did not include previous spouse problems, in-laws problems, and financial problems in the program requirements. Therefore, it is hoped that further in-depth research on this part will be carried out. The purpose of this study was to maintain the strengths that have been newly applied and implemented in the counseling area. Domestic and foreign studies of remarried families mainly employed negative social and cultural stereotypes as well as a problem-oriented view or a loss-oriented view that remarried families are highly vulnerable in terms of family relationships and functions. However, in addition to the deficit perspective or problem-oriented perspective on remarried families, this study sought to focus on the strengths of remarried families and the potential for remarried families to exercise.

In this study, it is regrettable that the contents of the program to improve the relationship between remarried couples based on the types of remarried families such as simple remarried families and complex remarried families were not differentiated due to the lack of data collection. Nevertheless, the findings could be useful for developing programs for future remarried couples at a time when research and program development on remarried families is insufficient. The findings could be used in intervention strategies to prevent remarriage rates of remarried couples and strengthen their ties to remarried families, and could be theoretical and clinical data that can be applied to remarried family counseling or family therapy programs.